Helpful Tips for Bath Time

These strategies will help you and your child to find the fun in bath time - and get your child washing without any help from you.

Turn bath time into a bedtime ritual.

To avoid arguments, make bath time happen at regular times-- on a schedule that you set. Don't ask kids if they want a bath, unless it's a real question. Otherwise, you are inviting a power struggle. Scheduling the bath before bedtime is a great way of winding down for most kids.

Race your child to the bathroom.

For kids that just won't get in, try chasing them around the house a few times. Or let them race you to the bathroom door. You may wind up giggling, instead of struggling.

Teach your child how to wash her body and hair.

Even though you have washed your child countless times, you might not have actually demonstrated how to wash. Show your child how to rinse well (both hair and body) and explain why it's important. You might review the steps by asking your child to wash a toy, doll or plastic animal. As your child washes, emphasize the important parts, like getting hair wet before putting on the shampoo.

Give your child control of the washcloth in the tub.

This simple action puts your child in charge in a positive, proactive way. (You supervise, but your child does the washing.) This approach empowers your child to start to wash- without your help - and can also help to work through resistance. In fact, encouraging kids to wash themselves may help them to overcome bath time fears.

Be there as your child takes the lead.

Even though your child is becoming independent, you are still needed for safety, and to check the work. (Make sure that hair gets wet before putting on shampoo!) Staying nearby is a way of staying close and letting your child know how much you support the progress. Long after kids are able to wash on their own, they like (and still need) your company.

Take it slow and stay connected.

If your child gets scared in the bath, take some time to hang out together and play before you start washing. Resist the urge to get it over with, as that might only set you up for a battle. In fact, rushing your child through bath time might actually take more time, because of the upset it can cause. You might give a scared child a chance to say, “Ready, set, go” before you start washing.

Have some baths just for fun.

If you find that your child (and you) are dreading bath time, try a bath that's just for fun. Let your child set some rules such as "No soap," "No shampoo," "No time limit," and even "Splash Dad." A couple of joyful experiences may help a resistant child forget what the fuss was about. A fun bath is also a great way for a child to practice washing skills on a favorite doll or toy.

Play the Stop and Go Game

“Play this game to overcome resistance and get kids washing on their own. Pick an activity your child does not like, such as rinsing their hair.

Fill a container with water and stand far away from the bathtub. Explain the rules; “I will start walking towards you but will freeze when you say, ‘Stop.' I will start again when either of us says, ‘Go.' (It's important you don't leave ‘go' only to the child.)

Take slow steps and ham it up when your child calls, ‘Stop.' Listen to your child, as he needs to trust that you will stop when he says to stop. If your child seems agitated, slow down even more before pouring the water. As you get close, your child's tension may release into floods of giggles or even shivers of nervousness. This is normal.

It seems like this game will take forever, but it actually only takes a few minutes. And it winds up saving you lots and lots of time, because next time you may not have the endless arguments.”

Dr. Lawrence Cohen
Kandoo®'s Parenting Expert
Author, Playful Parenting